Former Guardian – Always Running

She ran and ran and ran, but never gained any distance from what was following her. She was so alone, always so completely alone. Sometimes she wondered if things had ever been different or if she had been stuck like this, forever running and never gaining her freedom.

She sometimes remembered that it once had, that things had been different and she had been safe and warm. There had been a time when fearing had been a relief, because it meant that someone else was the most powerful and that someone else was also a benevolent someone who would shine down warmth and protection upon those below.

Those days were long gone and it was as much her own fault as it was those of her bloodline that she would forever be hunting down. Her brother had once been everything she had wanted to be. He had been loyal and caring and, above all, trustworthy. He was none of that now. Now, he was a danger to more than just himself. He was a danger to all and any that existed or even might exist.

The knowledge he had, the capabilities that he had been blessed with had once made him the most sought after of their rank. That person now only existed as a phantom in much the same way her peace would forever exist.

As an afterthought of an impossible future.


Written for Trifecta’s weekday challenge this week, but in the same story as the last challenge.

Now, onto this week’s prompt. We’re still not totally spooked out by you guys yet and we’re a little way from Halloween proper so get your ghoul glad rags on again this week. If there’s anyone who puts the ghoul in ghoulish, it’s you lot. Have fun and, as always, make sure you use the THIRD definition. This week we are back to entries of 33-333 words.

PHANTOM (noun)

1   a :  something apparent to sense but with no substantial existence :  APPARITION

b :  something elusive or visionary

c :  an object of continual dread or abhorrence <the phantom of disease and want>

2 :  something existing in appearance only

3 :  a representation of something abstract, ideal, or incorporeal <she was a phantom of delight — William Wordsworth>
– See more at: http://www.trifectawritingchallenge.com/#sthash.fho512wg.dpuf


Edit: Fixed a line that made things confusing. This was pointed out by one of the comments. Thanks for the catching that! I appreciate constructive criticism as it really helps.

4 thoughts on “Former Guardian – Always Running

  1. A great concept here – you do a really nice job conveying a sense of urgency and motion. If you don’t mind a little concrit, you’ve got a bit of a contradiction in here. In the first paragraph, you say “Sometimes she wondered if things had ever been different…” and then in the second “She knew that it once had, that things had been different…” I think I get what you’re trying to convey, but you might need to tweak it a bit to make it work. If you started the second paragraph with a parallel phrase (“Sometimes she remembered that…”) it would make an interesting contrast. I really liked the last two paragraphs, especially the last line. “An afterthought of an impossible future” is a great phrase.

    Like

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