“It tears holes in people in different ways. Holes you can’t fill. That’s not what you’re trying to do. You’re not trying to fill it. You’re trying to help them live with it.”
“Star, you need to grieve.”
Solaris shook her head, the earrings on her ears tinkling as the symbols on them making the soft noise, “You haven’t, Star, you really haven’t.”
Star says nothing; the black of her suit doesn’t sparkle the way it used to, the way it’s supposed to as a representation of the night sky.
The young-seeming woman turns and for the first time since Solaris has been crowned the Solar Monarch walks away without so much as a gesture to the woman she’s sworn to protect and obey until the day the Solar Monarch is laid to rest in the ground.
Solaris watches with sorrow-filled eyes as her oldest friend walks away from her.
“Oh, my dear friend, just because she is lost doesn’t mean that your sister won’t ever be found.”
Star doesn’t hear her, she’s too far away, lost in the grief that she won’t let herself feel.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. –Psalm 23:1
Softly shushes me and
Holds me close. Comforting
Even as I am allowed to grieve.
Perhaps this Person knows
How it is to grieve and that
Eventually it all needs to be
Released so that I can
Deal with this pain.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff comfort me. –Psalm 23:4
Today I am thankful for the ability to grieve. It’s not something people usually think about when someone or something is gone. Being able to grieve is a gift that we don’t think about.
Some cannot cry
They sit and wonder why
No tears will flow
Their hearts can’t let go
They keep trying
Some continue crying
Wanting to be free
To let themselves be
Learning to grieve
To find something to believe
Doesn’t mean you forget
Doesn’t mean you don’t regret.
She screamed out her anger, her rage and her grief.
The winds ripped around her, destroying whatever they could grasp in their wispy fingers and shredding anything that stood against them. Ice spiked out from her and were reduced to hard needles in the whirlwind.
She doesn’t look up to view the destruction she has caused, is causing. She doesn’t care.
In her arms lies her child, his eyes blank and his features slack.
Rigor mortis has not set in yet.
Written because when I’m tired and my head aches a certain way, this scene will not go away.
This was also written quite a bit ago and couldn’t decide if it would settle itself into my Former Guardian universe or not. It just sort of floats around my head from time to time and is incredibly depressing.
That is what we are called.
We were created
By our Mother of All.
She was so Lonely,
Our Mother of All,
She called out for others,
But none answered Her Call.
Tears welled up in her eyes,
She sobbed out her heart,
Begging others with cries
To come and stay with Her.
When tears fell from her cheeks
They splattered on the ground
And grew up and up,
Until she was surrounded all around.
Different things sprung up
And with a tremulous smile,
The Mother of All
Found Her worthwhile.
Also, this is sort of an homage to a universe that I’ve been writing in since grade school. It’s a partially finished work that I have worked off and on through for over a decade and a half at least. I’ve known how it was to end almost since the beginning, it’s getting to the ending that has always been a bit of a problem. The most interesting thing about this story is that it was something that I inherited from a friend and is in no way shape or form a fanfiction. Someday I hope to finished this particular story.
Those eyes look back at me, I saw in them one more like me. I was not as alone as I had thought. Now I sit warm, my cat next to me, alive.
Written for this week’s Trifecta about my cat who claimed me, not the other way around, soon after I lost my previous cat to old age. She’s not at all like Tommy was and for that I love her all the more. She didn’t try to replace him, just carved a new niche for herself in my life.