For Now

“You won’t forget her just because you let yourself heal.” –from a fanfiction

 

Star didn’t want to heal.

Everyone knew that and no one said anything about it. Most didn’t want to bother, still didn’t trust her or were too afraid to bring something like that up to one of the few chaos-souled that had never lost control of themselves in a way that was dangerous to those she had sworn to protect. Not even her sister had been able to keep that oath (though precious few would ever admit that to even themselves). Star had never lost control of her abilities or herself even when she’d felt the complete destruction of her sister-soul’s control and stability of mind.

That didn’t mean that Star wasn’t hurt, though, or that she was stable. She just wasn’t dangerous, a loose cannon, whatever people wanted to call it.

She hurt and she existed and she continued to protect and fight and do just about everything but go crazy and die or actually live.

Star was fine with that.

Others, not so much.

“I just think that spending time with Jack might help.”

“I am not going in for counseling with Jack.”

“I didn’t say that! Just, I don’t know, hang out?”

“No.”

“It’s not like he’s going to do anything.”

“Good, because there’s nothing to do.”

“Star…”

“Lane.”

Solaris huffed a small laugh, knowing without having to say anything that the only reason Star had used her Private Name was to tell her that Star was just fine with the way things were and to politely back off.

The Solar Monarch allowed it.

For now.

Miracles Amongst Us – Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for the miracle of healing. We have a new kitten named Shadow in the family and almost a week after he joined us he darted under my sister’s youngest’s feet at the last, and worst, moment. Now it’s fairly normal for animals to get stepped on in one way or another and to recover just fine. There’s just one thing. Shadow’s head was stepped on while they were on tile. I won’t go into detail on how Shadow looked or what he sounded like. We asked our neighbor to come and give Shadow a priesthood blessing and fasted and prayed as well.

“Yea, cry unto him for mercy; for he is mighty to save. Yea, humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him. Cry unto him when ye are in your fields, yea, over all your flocks…But this is not all; ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness. Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.” (Alma 34: 18-20, 26-27)

Shadow is shortly recovering. The Lord was merciful to our little kitty and for that I am forever grateful, but I know that this is not all. The Lord has been very good to my family, has blessed us in many things, though Shadow’s life is one of the greatest to me right now.

“For of him unto whom much is given much is required; and he who sins against the greater light shall receive the greater condemnation.” (D&C 82:3)

“And now behold, my beloved brethren, I say unto you, do not suppose that this is all; for after ye have done all these things, if ye turn away the needy, and they naked, and visit not the sick and afflicted, and impart of your substance, if ye have, to those who stand in need—I say unto you, if ye do not any of these things, behold, your prayer is vain, and availeth you nothing, and ye are as hypocrites who do deny the faith.” (Alma 34:28)

We have been given much this past week and now it is our turn to give as well.

Check out the original Thankful Thursday. (Will update link when able.)

Push Her Away – SoC

“Stay back!”

“I just want to he-”

“I said don’t touch me!” the woman was hysterical when they reached them, flinging herself back from the child in front of her with a full body lunge that ended with her on her back.

She winced, evidence that she was injured showing as red started to spread through her shirt, dark though it was.

They had been startled by the sudden appearance of the woman and the child, but that was broken when the child let loose a sob, but didn’t step towards the fallen woman once more.

It wouldn’t be until much later that they would discover the reason the woman hadn’t wanted the child, her niece, to touch her. Apparently the child could heal by taking on the wounds of those she was touching. The slash all along the woman’s front would have killed her before the child’s quick healing would be able to take care of it for her.


This snippet is brought to you by the Stream of Consciousness prompt for this weekend, which was given by one of the lovely December substitutes over at lindeaghill.

Eventually… – Day Nineteen

Universal disease can only be cured in one way.
Never let it be unsaid that the cure wasn’t painful.
Even though she was alone, she wasn’t
Quite alone. There was another here who stayed
Until she gained some kind of mental footing.
Although she understood why she had been sent away,
Longing filled her split soul.

Sun’s coming up, coming up down on main street…Head in my hands, here I am standing in my bare feet.

Watching you drive away, watching you drive away. – Dixie Chicks

Bared in a way that she had never been before,
In her heart she was alone.
There was no soothing force that spread and healed
The cracks in her mind.
Eventually, she would accept that this was now her life.
Reality had always been harsh and yet…
Something within told her that this 
Was only the beginning…
Even should she ever find her other half,
Even should she stand next to her family…
There was no doubt in her mind that her sister was just as torn.

Written for today’s NaPoWriMo prompt on using a sea shell: http://www.napowrimo.net/2014/04/day-19-2/

Also, this is a part of one of my ongoing little universes. It’s been a bit since I’ve visited one of them with a poem.

Relative Perspective

It was some time before she was even aware of the concept of time. Most of her days went something like this:

She woke up, she couldn’t tell when it was, but there was always someone who entered with a bowl of broth soon afterwards. She would eat as much as she could before she’d fall asleep again.

She’d wake up sometime latter to have a small repeat.

Sometimes when she wakes, the man who found her is there; sometimes he’s not. There doesn’t seem to be any pattern to it and she doesn’t think much to try and find one. She’s too tired for that.

(Why is she so tired?)

Eventually, she notices that she has several different things attached to her person, but for the life of her she can’t remember what they are or what purpose they serve.

She doesn’t have it in her to do more than stare at them before she’s fallen asleep once more.

They’re still there when she wakes and after a moment of trying to remove one, she’s stopped by the man who’d found her and. presumably, brought her here.

“Leave them,” he speaks in a quiet voice that is very deep, but his touch is gentle, “you are still recovering.”

She falls asleep again before he can say anything else.

The next time she wakes, she ignores the things and eats her broth without any extra movements other than her eyes following the movements of the woman spoon feeding her the soup. She’s too tired for anything else.

By the time she’s strong enough to feed herself, there’s some kind of bread in the broth as well. She doesn’t bother with wiping up every time she spills as she’s too busy being grateful she can lift the spoon to her mouth without aid. The spoon is unsteady and she suspects that the bread is partially there so that there is less liquid to drip on herself.

This time, there is a smile of satisfaction on her lips as she falls asleep once more.


He’s not quite sure what to think of the young woman on the bed before him.

She is a pale thing, all red hair and dark eyes and thin cheeks. She seems wasted, as if she’d had an illness and had only recently been cured from it, only to face her body after the ordeal.

He wonders, not for the first time, where she has come from and how she came to be in the alley that he’d found her near. She doesn’t seem to be the kind of woman or even man that would frequent such an area and her body shows no signs of drugs or abduction. She isn’t malnourished and though she is thin and pale and wasted looking, she is otherwise healthy.

Alexander feels a buzzing in his pocket and withdraws a beeper. He hadn’t brought his phone in with him, hadn’t wanted to chance it messing with the equipment or going off when she was awake and startling her.

(She had been so curious about the wires and leads and didn’t seem to understand what they were for.)

He sighs at the code and, with a nod to the nurse outside the room, leaves the wing she’s being kept in. He stops at the end to retrieve his phone and his tablet.

At first he hadn’t been certain why he’d felt the need to talk her with him and have his own doctors look after her. Even when the reports of her physical condition were given he hadn’t known why. Alexander was a businessman, and he does give generously to charities as well as other organizations. He does not bring people in need home with him, no matter what the tabloids say.

He still does not know why she is here, yet he makes no move to send her away, though in her state, it would be very easy to do so.

She has been there for half a year already, but her physical improvement is slower than initially projected by his doctors. No one knows why.

He doesn’t even know her name.


Written for this week’s Daily Post’s weekly writing challenge: https://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/03/10/weekly-writing-challenge-golden-years/

I’m not entirely sure why it didn’t mention much about age and only about how time is relative to different people due to perspective, but it would only be written like this.

Safety in Death?

The ritual had worked, Comet was far from here and safe. Safe for the first time since long before the War had started. Their enemies would never find Star’s sister, not without Star or the Queen actively helping them and even then it was a long shot.

“Star, she is safe.”

Star nodded and bowed her head as her queen smiled tiredly at her before leaving the room.

She did not respond to anyone else as they spoke quietly both to her and around her before they, too, left for a well-deserved rest. The ritual they had used to both heal her sister and to send her away (because in order to heal her, they’d had to block her connections to those still here, and the only way to do that had been to send her away) had been a success.

Soon, Star was the only one left in the room. She didn’t bother looking around the room, just walked slowly towards the center where a cot had been placed. The cot was still warm from when her sister had been under the blankets and Star knelt by the cot and placed her hands in the blankets. She clutched them to her face and bowed her head. Silent tears began to soak into the fabric as her slender shoulders shook with the weight of her sobs.

She couldn’t feel her sister in her mind, in her very soul, anymore.

It was like she was dead in the worst possible way.

After all, even when their Queen had been dead, before she’d been brought back by the power of the Lunar Healing Crystal, they had still felt her presence within their hearts.

There wasn’t even that to indicate that Comet had ever existed. No torn threads, no aching apology for leaving them behind. Just…nothing…


Written for this week’s Dungeon Prompt: http://theseekersdungeon.com/2014/02/20/dungeon-prompts-season-2-week-8-when-did-death-become-real-for-you/