Moments in the Dark

The Spirit is still and small and it doesn’t compete. –from the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

 

Let me help to gently quide

In and out your daily life

Sending comfort and love in stride

To bolster you up through all strife

Especially when the boat does rock

Never forsaking you in the stocks.

 

Often I find myself in places that I don’t remember straying,

Wondering just what I was saying

To myself to let me take this turn

And losing my mind as my stomach does churn.

But with a still small voice

I remember I have a choice

To follow through the darkness where it will lead

And find myself in my mind while I plead

To be found no matter how lost

And accept the payment of the cost.

I won’t give up trying

No matter how I feel like dying

And take one more step

Then another, and yet…

I was not as alone

As I had previously thought

I was always with

The One that I sought.

Stitched From the Heart – Thankful Thursday

Quietly waiting to wrap around

Until the night sends its darkest hound.

In which comfort is drawn

Like love sent from beyond.

There is nothing more beautiful than a mother’s love.

image: Miri on my quilt, from martha0stout's phone

image: Miri on my quilt, from martha0stout’s phone

This week I am grateful for the lovely quilt that my mother made me when I was a teenager.

Check out the original Thankful Thursday. (I will update the link when able.)

EDIT: Link updated as of May 30, 2015

Fear Not, I Am With Thee

‘Fear not, I am with thee

Oh be not afraid

For I am thy God

And will still give thee aid

I’ll strengthen thee,

Help thee

And cause thee to stand

Upheld by my righteous omnipotent hand.

–LDS Hymn Book #85 – How Firm A Foundation

I’m human, I fear things and I worry about things a lot.

I worry that the next litter of rabbits will die before they can grow old enough. We’ve already lost 2 of the 3 litters that our rabbits have had.

I worry that the littlest chickies won’t survive as we’ve already lost one of the new six.

I worry that the chickens that are almost full grown will die as we just lost one of them last week due to illness though the rest of the flock are doing well.

I worry that the goats will get loose and I won’t be able to track them down in time to get them to come back.

I worry that the boys will miss their bus to school and I have no other way to get them the twenty miles from our house to the school building.

I worry that my mom will fall over and we will have to wait, at best, almost an hour for an ambulance to arrive.

I worry about people that I don’t see every day or even once a month.

I worry a lot. It’s something that I have struggled with throughout the majority of my adult life.

But one thing that I never fear is that the Lord will not answer my prayers. That He will not send the Comforter to be with me in my time of sorrow when I hold seven little bunnies who didn’t make it through the night. That He won’t prompt a neighbor to randomly drop by when I just need someone to talk to about nothing in particular. That He won’t find some other way to send me the aid I need even if it’s only my cat curling up on me at night and purring me to sleep after several sleepless hours.

I don’t fear His abandonment and so long as He walks with me then I know that I will not fall. Or if I do, He will be there to offer me a hand and pull back onto my feet and into His arms.

This little rant was brought to you by the Dungeon Prompt: Fear, How Do You Use It?

Kind Words – Thankful Thursday

How often do we speak kind words to each other? –Linda K. Burton

For a while, I was having a very hard time with my in ability to do anything. This was several years ago and just as I was adjusting to adult life while struggling with my lack of energy and my health, which at the time wasn’t very good at all. Getting out of bed seemed impossible at the time and getting dressed wasn’t even on my mind. My head always ached and at times any kind of light was too much. My sister’s children tried their hardest to be quiet, but even the sound of the wind on the window caused lances of pain in my head.

I was becoming bitter and so incredibly melancholy that nothing helped.

One day, my sister turned to me and told me (after a rather harsh argument over…something…I cannot remember now) that ‘just because you are feeling miserable does not give you the right to make those around you just as miserable. Why don’t you try thinking of at least one positive thing about every person you come across during the day?’

It was something I’d never thought about.

I had been a generally happy (and over excitable) child and had rarely had to worry about being too negative, so I had never practiced being positive about things.

So I started a list that I kept on my computer (because I wrote a lot during those months before I started getting stronger). I called it ‘Positive Side of Life List’ and I added to it every single day until, several months later, I realized that the first things I thought about weren’t negative, whether they were about me or someone else. There are still times when I go back and look through that list, but I am always grateful for that suggestion (though at the time it was closer to a demand) from my sister. It was just what I needed.

Sometimes kind words come after a harsh scolding.

Check out the original Thankful Thursday. (I will update the link when able.)

EDIT: Link updated as of May 2, 2015.

Faithful Companions – Thankful Thursday

Today I am grateful for the companionship of my cats and dog. Without them I know that I would have gone mad throughout my life. The companions may have changed in physical form, but I know that even when they pass on, they can continue to keep me company when I need it the most.

image; m

image: me and Tommy

Check out the original Thankful Thursday. (I hope to fix this link eventually.)

EDIT: Link updated March 7, 2015

The Love of a Family

Where do I go to find companionship?
Am I left drifting and alone?
Reaching out has always burned me in the past;
Don’t really know what to do…
 
For this moment, we are here
And here we shall stay.
My sister, my brother
I know it has been hard;
Love and acceptance
You will find aplenty.
 

This poem is dedicated to the River Bend Young Single Adult Ward in Utah and how I felt while I was there. The only sad thing about moving for me is the fact that I can’t take all of these wonderful people with me.

Walk Through The Night – Thankful Thursday

Today I am grateful for all the times my mother sang us to sleep as children. She loves music and wrote different lullabies for each of her eight children and some of her friends’ children as well. I have no children as of yet, but I do have ten nieces and nephews and I have sung each of them to sleep at least once using music that my mother used to sing me to sleep with. Sadly I do not have a recording of any of her lovely music, but I do have a song written and performed by Cherie Call that reminds me very much of what my mom did every other night for her children. (It was every other night because she switched off with Dad, who told us stories to lull us to sleep.)

Check out the original Thankful Thursday.